Diversions & Digressions | fanfiction by mara

In the Event of My Death

In the Event of My Death

by Mara

Summary: Trip decides to record a message to be played in the event of his death.

NOTES: I think brushes with death affect everyone differently. Hoshi’s response
to the events of “Shuttlepod One” can be seen in my fic “Dear Annie.” This is
Trip’s reaction. Thanks to Josephine for looking at this when I wasn’t entirely
sure what it was…

* * * * *

“Ya know, I hate recording these things. But…it’s all Malcolm’s fault for
putting it into my head. I’ve been thinking about this since we almost died in
that shuttle. I want to be sure that if something happens to me, I won’t have
left a bunch of important things unsaid.

“So, here I am, recording a message to be played in the event of my death. Which
means, if you’re watching this, I’m dead.

“Damn, that sounds bad.

“Well, here goes. Mom, Dad, the rest of the family, I love you all. What else
can I say? I miss you and I’m sorry to put you through this. But you know I had
to be here. This ship is amazing and if I’d missed the chance to be Chief
Engineer on the first Warp 5 ship, I’d never have forgiven myself.

“Besides, how could I let Captain Archer go without me to watch his back and
keep the ship in one piece? I couldn’t trust anyone else.

“Jon…don’t blame yourself. On that shuttle, I told Malcolm it was an honor
servin’ with you. And it has been. You’re the best Captain and the best friend a
man could ask for, and I know that whatever might have happened to me, you did
your best to prevent it. Besides, you’ve saved my life so many times I’ve lost
count.

“You just drink some bourbon in my memory and get back to work. If you start
mopin’ around, I’ll have to come back and haunt you. You got more important
things to do out here than mourn me.

“T’Pol, I don’t think you’re gonna miss me much–I’ve just been one huge pain in
your Vulcan ass. But if I’m dead, I guess I should admit that I respect you.
Hell, I admire your courage. It took a lot of guts to stay on this ship with a
bunch of smelly, loud, obnoxious humans. We must look as bad as Klingons to you
sometimes.

“You’ve defied your people any number of times to stick by us, and that can’t
have been easy. For whatever it’s worth, it’s been an honor serving with you as
well.

“Malcolm, you made me so angry when you recorded all those messages on the
shuttle, but now that I’ve started this, I understand. So, Malcolm, I want to
thank you. For yanking me out of that airlock, for doin’ your best to keep us
safe, even when we absolutely refuse to take your advice, for makin’ me stop and
think about my assumptions.

“You’re a damn good armory officer, and a damn good friend. There’s nobody I’d
rather have running weapons on Enterprise.

“Hoshi, it’s been nothing but a pleasure watching you come into your own out
here. I know it’s been tough finding your space legs, but I’m glad you came.
When I hear your voice on the comm it’s like I know I’m comin’ home, and
Enterprise wouldn’t be the same without you.

“You’re the best linguist in Starfleet, and I hope you realize how many times
you’ve saved our butts. Make sure you always remember your successes and don’t
get overwhelmed by the occasional, unavoidable failures.

“Travis, your enthusiasm has gotten us through more than one scrape, and so has
your piloting. I know it was tough to leave your family to join Starfleet, but I
sure hope you think it was worth it, ’cause we do. Their loss was definitely our
gain. Keep up the good work and I know one day you’ll become a Captain worth
serving under.

“To my engineering crew, you big lugs, you just keep my engines up to par, you
hear me? I know you can do it, because you are without question the finest
engineers I’ve ever known and you’ve all repeatedly gone above and beyond the
call of duty. Take care of whoever replaces me, and make them look as good as
you made me look.

“I hope nobody ever sees this. I want to live to see Charles Tucker IV born. I
want to live to a ripe old age tellin’ my grandkids about my adventures on the
Enterprise, and how back in my day we could only go Warp 5 and we were damn
grateful for that.

“But in case I do die, I want you all to know how much this crew, this ship,
means to me. And if I die, know that I died doin’ what I love and I don’t regret
a minute of it.

“Take care of yourselves, everyone.”

* * * * *

Trip’s quarters were quiet as he pressed the button to stop the recording and
leaned back in his chair. Long moments passed as he contemplated the screen
uneasily, until the subliminal humming of his engines soothed him.

Finally, he encrypted his message and attached it to his personnel file: “To be
played only in the event of my death.”

His door chimed and he looked up. “Come,” he called.

Hoshi and Malcolm stepped through the doorway. “Have you changed your mind?”
Malcolm asked.

“Hmm?” Trip stared at the two of them in confusion.

“You’ve forgotten already? We were going to have dinner and then watch tonight’s
movie,” Hoshi said, looking closely at him. “Is everything okay?”

Trip smiled at her. “Yeah, everything’s fine. I just got busy and didn’t notice
what time it was.” He stood up and followed them toward the door.

“Well, it must have been pretty important to make you forget that Chef promised
you fried chicken *and* pecan pie,” Hoshi said, slapping his shoulder.

Trip looked back at the screen as the door closed behind them. “Yeah, it was
important. But it’s done.”

–end–

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